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# 35
Diamond Ring
A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas. A friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty 4-Wheel drive vehicles." "She did." he replied. "But where in the hell was I gonna find a fake Jeep?"

 
# 36
Note
Once a couple had one of their usual quarrels; as a consequence of which, all conversation between them stopped. Unfortunately the husband was to attend his office very early the next morning. So he wrote on a piece of paper, “Please wake me up at 6 a.m. tomorrow morning,” and kept it beside his wife’s pillow. His wife read it and went to sleep. He woke up very late next morning and got very angry. He looked ferociously at his wife, but she calmly pointed towards his pillow. Under his pillow he founded a piece of paper. On it was written, “Please wake up, it is 6 o’ clock now.

 
# 37
Dinner Invitation
Two Sardariji’s lived in a multistoreyed building, one on the first floor and second on the eighth floor. But there was a great enmity between the two. Once the Sardarji on the eight floor tried to fool the Sardarji living on the first floor by calling him for dinner. When the Sardarji reached the eight floor for dinner he saw that the house of his neighbor was locked and a board was hanging on the door, on which was written: “Kaisa ulloo banaya”. The Saradrji felt embarrassed and turning the board to the other side wrote: “Main to yahan aaya hi nahi tha.”

 
# 38
Service
A husband visited a marriage counsellor and said, "When we were first married, I would come home from the office, my wife would bring my slippers and our cute little dog would run around barking. Now after ten years it's all different. I come home, the dog brings the slippers and my wife runs around barking." "Why complain?" said the counsellor, "You're still getting the same service!"

 
# 39
Akbar Birbal
Emperor Akbar was bending down to pick up a couple of coins that had dropped from his pockets when Birbal tiptoed behind him and administered a harmless tap on the royal behind. The king leaped up, and when he came down was in such a rage that he ordered Birbal’s execution. When he calmed down slightly, however, he announced that Birbal would be given his freedom if he could come up with an excuse more outrageous that the original act. Birbal promptly said, “As a matter of fact, I didn’t know it was you – I thought it was the Queen.”

 
# 40
Misspelled
A colleague recently visited Kulu Manali. He was so overwhelmed by the scenic beauty that he wired his wife – WISH YOU WERE HERE. On his return the poor chap had to face a hostile atmosphere and a furious wife. Reason? A distorted message reading: WISH YOU WERE HER!

 
# 41
Parking
Banta Singh was in court charged with parking his car in a restricted area. The judge asked him if he had anything to say in his defense. “They should not put up such misleading notices,” said Banta Singh. “It said, FINE FOR PARKING HERE

 
# 42
Second Question
The school Inspector asked the class whether he should ask one difficult question, or two simple questions. A clever student told him to ask only one difficult question. The inspector asked him the place where the first woman was born. The boy answered that it was the Lady Hardinge Hospital, New Delhi. “How do you know?” the Inspector asked. “No second question, please,” the boy triumphantly replied.

 
# 43
Counting
Once a Jat went to Bombay. While passing through a road he saw a very high building. He was amazed to see it, and decided to count its stories. As he was doing so a townsman saw him and tried to befool him. So he approached the Jat and asked, “What are you doing?” When he was told the answer the townsman said that one had to pay two rupees for every storey counted. “How many have you counted?” The Jat said ten and gave the man twenty rupees. Walking away the Jat was very happy to think how he has befooled the other man, for he had counted twenty.

 
# 44
Father
"You looked troubled," I told my friend, "what's your problem?" He replied, "I'm going to be a father." "But that's wonderful," I said. "What's wonderful? My wife doesn't know about it yet."

 
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